Be kinder than necessary, because everyone you meet is fighting some sort of battle.

NO ONE CAN HELP YOU UNLESS YOU HELP YOURSELF FIRST ...

I understood this fact when I faced the reality of my life...my close friends helped me realize this..they came up with solutions like "tie a thread on your pinky so that you would be reminded when to bite your tongue".Just when I was working on it , the big thunder cracked above my head.But I wasn't shattered because I knew no one could help me unless I helped myself.My best friend said I couldn't keep anything to myself..well I did .Anyways , before revealing the changes it brought into my life I would like to mention how happy I am.I got a phone call from a person who supposedly was to be my friend for 6 years saying " you got no friends Dan,just look around you..you are so cheap". Well now my reply to that someone would be "why don't you look around yourself ...you got friends who never liked you in fact bitched about you..at least I never had friends like that and please reimburse the complete Bangalore trip which was on me :) ".I thought I would be lonely in Mangalore but no..God helped me a lot through the struggle ..though my first 2 years weren't very memorable and cheerful but I have managed to make my final year and also my life very colorful with many new friends..obviously this doesn't mean I would forget my old friends , I would never do that. speaking about my life now..I think its great !Now who ever thought that I was lonely..I think its high time you spoke for yourself !And yea one more thing to mention or point out to the person who said " look what your doing Dan..you are bitching about everyone" , well hope that someone realizes that I had bitched along with her..I guess when the time comes everyone wants their hands clean.Anyways I think am just over it..I got a big mouth and I like to talk..thats something I would never wanna control.YOU BE CAREFUL WITH WHAT YOU WANNA SAY TO ME ...

It would be every selfish of me if I dint mention about a special someone ...he has been with me whenever I wanted him.I would rather not say anything more cause I guess there has already been quite a lot of love stories in my earlier blog..but this one's special and I want to keep this one to myself...he is just too precious to be talked about.Hope this one works.....

IT MUST HAVE BEEN.............

Lay a whisper on my pillow

Leave the winter on the ground

I wake up lonely, is there a silence

In the bedroom and all around

Touch me now, I close my eyes

And dream away...

It must have been love, but it's over now

It must have been good, but I lost it somehow

It must have been love, but it's over now

From the moment we touched till the time had run out

Make believing we're together

That I'm sheltered by your heart

But in and outside I turn to water

Like a teardrop in your palm

And it's a hard winter's day

I dream away...

It must have been love, but it's over now

It was all that I wanted, now I'm living without

It must have been love, but it's over now

It's where the water flows, it's where the wind blows

It must have been love, but it's over now

It must have been good, but I lost it somehow

It must have been love, but it's over now

From the moment we touched till the time had run out

P.S ..this song has no resemblance to my life or to any person living or dead !!

THERE WAS ONLY ONE THING MISSING IN MY LIFE....!!!

There was a time once when I was alone..but not anymore.I found my only friend and after that I was never alone.Those who know me would not believe this change in me but for all I know is that I am happy.All I needed was a little guidance...I never saw this change coming in me.I guess it was high time for me to realise that life had much more than sorrow and worry.I have forgotten my past as it means nothing to me now..all that matters is the present which I am working on to make my future beautiful.

Now when I look ahead ..I feel so positive.I know I have the capability to make things better ..suddenly I have the faith in me that I can make things work( if I want to).I am so powerful because I have learnt to control my life in my very own style..like they say be 'the ruler of your life..don't let anyone else rule it for you'.

From my previous posts anyone can make out that most of the pain was caused by someone or the other.But not anymore cause I have decided not to give anyone the right to hurt me.For this to happen I need to be more careful with what I say and do.My mouth has been the main reason for putting me into trouble but am working on it now.So far the results are good:)

My plan for life-to be happy.Its time to wait for the right one.Don't wanna screw up anything anymore..time will get me closer to the best things in life...just like how time heals every wound in the same way time will bring the solution to my problems.Till then I am going to wait........

AWESOME GOD !!!

When He rolls up His sleeves He ain't just puttin' on the ritz (our God is an awesome God) There is thunder in His footsteps And lightning in His fist (our God is an awesome God) Well, the Lord wasn't joking When He kicked 'em out of Eden It wasn't for no reason that He shed his blood His return is very close and so you better be believing that our God is an awesome God Our God(our God) is an awesome God He reigns(He reigns) from heaven above With wisdom(with wisdom) pow'r and love our God is an awesome God And when the sky was starless in the void of the night (our God is an awesome God) He spoke into the darkness and created the light (our God is an awesome God) Judgment and wrath he poured out on Sodom Mercy and grace He gave us at the cross I hope that we have not too quickly forgotten that our God is an awesome God Our God(our God) is an awesome God He reigns(He reigns) from heaven above With wisdom(with wisdom) pow'r and love our God is an awesome God Our God is an awesome God Our God is an awesome God (Our God is an awesome God) (Our God is an awesome God)

STORY..from my viewpoint !!!

X loved Y for a very long time..say for 6years..you cant say love exactly cause in this duration X fucked every girl possible..and Y was no saint as well rather went the way life took ..but not completely unaware of the presence of X's feelings towards Y.Y always saw a great friend in X..life once again brings them close ...at the point where they wanted one another(don't know about X but Y certainly did)..and then the most un expectable thing happened..Y fell in love with X..who would have ever imagined this but the most unimaginable things happen on this planet...but not a singe day passed in harmony..there were problems since day 1..firstly X dint trust in Y assuming that it was a tactic to forget the past and secondly X was caught up in situations which X wanted to clear before going any further into commitment...this was the daily scenario !!

Now the climax..one day out of the blue Y is warned by her family to stay away from X(and as you know family comes first for every person unless if their own family is messed)..so what would Y do?listen to the family or go along with that person who dint trust in her and had kept Y in doubt???however due to the fit of anger..Y at the moment created a distance between them but the next moment Y realised that what she did was completely wrong or at least the manner in which Y brought everything to an end was wrong.it took some time for Y to realise the mistake and that's when Y apologised...but till then X was very hurt..like OBVIOUSLY !!but what else could Y do..X who knew her for 7 years failed to understand the situation..so X decides to move on by not facing Y anymore.Y was very guilty so decided to shamelessly beg for forgiveness but X was determined and then that was the end!!

X could be happy because X could now get back to the messed up situations and sort it out or get more involved !!

Y could be happy because Y got to know how much love and attachment X had towards Y !!

MORAL OF THE STORY- Y saved herself from X !!!

100 truths about me..!!!

WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. Last beverage - coconut WATER :)
3. Last text message - 4m keziah
2. Last phone call - = my dad
4. Last song you listened to = sugar town by nancy sinatra
5. Last time you cried - last night
HAVE YOU EVER:
6. Dated someone twice - hmm yea
7. Been cheated on - hmm....
8. Kissed someone & regretted it -YES
9. Lost someone special - yeaahh :(
10. Been depressed - hmnn..yup
11. Been drunk and threw up - lol...lets nt talk abt it ;P

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
12. Black
13. Purple
14. White

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2010)
15. Made a new friend = yup
16. Fallen out of love = hmmnnnn........... YES AND NO
17. Laughed until you cried = yeaa manyyy tymz..
18. Met someone who changed you = YES.
19. Found out who your true friends were = i already knw..
20. Found out someone was talking about you = YES
21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list =..YES
22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life = almost all
23. How many kids do you want to have = 14
24. Do you have any pets = yeaahh a CAT(BABY)
25. Do you want to change your name = NO..i love it...
26. What did you do for your last birthday = hmn...cut d PIZZA..then a date and gt caught by the cops
27. What time did you wake up today = 07:00am
28. What were you doing at midnight last night = chatting with my uncle cum best friend
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for = CANT wait 4 tym 2 pass by....
30. Last time you saw your Mother = 2 weeks back
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? = everytin :(
32. What are you listening to right now? = leaving on a jet plane-JANIS JOPLIN
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom = YES
34. What's getting on your nerves right now =MY LENS
35. Most visited web page = FB
36. What’s your full name = Dan Bridgette Martis
37. Nicknames = lol...jst Dan
38. Relationship Status = .........Single.........
39. Zodiac sign = Cancer
40. Male or female? = FEMALE...duh!
41. Elementary School= united indian schooll,Kuwait
42. High School= united indian school
43. College = st.aloysius college,mangalore
44. Hair color = Brown..
45. Long or short = nt so short ..nt so long..
46. Height = 151cms
47. Do you have a crush on someone? = naahhhh..
48: What do you like about yourself? = hmm.. almost everytin i guess....!!
49. Piercings = Ears and belly
50. Tattoos = noooo....
51. Righty or left = RIGHT...

FIRSTS:
52. First surgery = dnt av 1 yet...
53. First piercing = EARS
54. First best friend =hmnnn......hmnnn......hmn.....hmn...no besties.... :P:P
55. First sport you joined = basketball....:P
56. First vacation = India
58. First pair of trainers = hu remembers...

RIGHT NOW:
59. Eating = hershy's white chocolate with cookies
60. Drinking = nothin
61. I'm about to = answer d nxt quest .. :P
62. Listening to = christina aguilera-fighter
63. Waiting for = a miracle

YOUR FUTURE:
64. Want kids? = DUH..!!
65. Get Married? = hmn...yeaahhh
66. Career? = afcuz...though i dunno wht.. maybe fashion designer
67. Lips or eyes = BOTH
68. Hugs or kisses = actually....both agn....:)
69. Shorter or taller = Taller duh...
70. Older or Younger = d guy shud definitely b elder...!!
71. Romantic or spontaneous = ROMANTIC
72. Nice stomach or nice arms =nice arms
73. Sensitive or loud = sensitive...
74. Hook-up or relationship = RELATIONSHIP
75. Trouble maker or hesitant = trouble maker... ^_^

HAVE YOU EVER :
76. Kissed a stranger = aahhh noooo....
77. Drank hard liquor= hmn....... :P:P
78. Lost glasses/contacts = contacts
79. Sex on first date = ohh hell NO..!!
80. Broken someone's heart = YES :( ..WHY DID I?
81. Had your own heart broken = hmm....yeaahh actually...
82. Been arrested = NOT EXACTLY :)
84. Cried when someone died = yup...duh..!!
85. Fallen for a friend? = nooo...!!

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
86. Yourself = yes i do..
87. Miracles = yes...badly w8in 4 1..!!
88. Love at first sight = nahh nt atall
89. Heaven = YEAH !!
90. Santa Claus = lol...nope..!!
91. Kiss on the first date = umm..yeaa depends...!!
92. Angels = ofcuz !!

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time = YES...JUST ONCE
95. Did you sing today? = yes...i do evryday... :P:P
96. Ever cheated on somebody? = YEA:(
97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go? = 2YEARS AND 1 MONTH
98. If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be? = AUGUST 8TH..made an unnecessary scene on my break up..guy wasnt worth the pain i took !!
99. Are you afraid of falling in love? = yeaahh :S :S
100. Posting this as 100 truths? - yeah..

Just when I thought.....

I have realised one thing one..I screw up everything when it comes to relationships.Just when I thought I took the right decision in my life..someone had to fuck my happiness..and this time my own blood.I am a sister first and then some one's friend..family always comes first..is int it?Sometimes mistakes happen and you speak shit but things spoken at the moment of anger are never true...if I had one chance to rewind my life then I would like to erase that moment in my life where I felt so helpless and created a distance between that person who always stood for me !!I hate myself for doing this...why dint I take things a bit calmly..I guess that word is not there in my dictionary..but he knows me so well..then why this pain when you know the truth deep inside you !!! People play games..and they are so good at it..

Now am standing exactly where I started...and this time am going to wait ...!!!

RISE AND SHINE ..............

Its time now...time to open my eyes and look for greater things... Hope is the power which keeps us living..the feeling which encourages us to work for a better tomorrow.There have been times when I lost it but then again life takes me back to where I started.I think I have mentioned this many times in my blog yet I would like to say it again "EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON..AND THE REASON IS ALWAYS FOR YOUR GOOD" ..Everything that happened in my life so far was nothing but a route to a much better future or else I would have been stuck with people who do not deserve to be a part of my life.

Feeling great!?...lol after all its not the same now..I had taken the pain which beared me no fruits.. I used to think that I had been really unfortunate when it came to certain things but now that word doesn't exist in my dictionary.Am the most luckiest girl ever..also the happy one.

I was out of topics , that's why I dint come up with new posts lately..today am writing my instant thoughts..got just two more days in Kuwait..this was the best vacation ever..Wish I could stay longer but at the same time wanna go to India:)

I got to know people whom I never knew or was afraid to know..they turned out to be the best people I had ever known.I am going to miss everything once am in India...back to shallow world=MANGALORE !!Mangalore is fun...people suck.Some bunch of people call themselves classy but show nothing but their shallowness.I guess this time I am going back to India with tolerance,experience etc etc..I think the best way to stay away from such people is by staying aloof.Some people say "hey dude...am a frigging party animal and blah blah blah"..lol I wonder how they can even stand the mangalore gay parties unless if they themselves are...lol.Once someone sent me a message saying ' party @ blah blah blah...house, trance blah blah blah..BYOB.' ....BRING YOUR OWN BOOZE.huh?..you call this a party?Its like in school you get your own tiffin and sit and eat at the cornor and sometimes maybe share a little with your friends.Today am so proud to say that am not a mangalorean..I come from a shitty village called SHIRVA...which also sucks but is not as bitchy as the great MANGALORE !

Am drifting from the topic I had in mind..today I wanted to write about TINA TURNER..I was deeply moved by her life story but anyways go to wickipedia and read it yourself if your interested to know about her.Today am in the mood of bitching about mangalore.OK,the next thing I hate is their mentality..no no not the backward mentality(so obvious after all its mangalore..not London)..its the superior mentality that some people have.I know this one guy who is damn smart...I mean it when I say damn smart..there is nothing in this world that he can not speak about...but whats the use of such smartness when your character is so sad??This guy is so aware of his smartness ,which is not a bad thing but boy..please don't fly so high that your very existence on the earth becomes irritating for some people.

Bitching is something which is very normal and found everywhere.In my opinion bitching is completely normal..in fact I wouldn't hate the person who would bitch about me but I would hate it if that person would pretend .Pretending is the real bitching...!!!

LOVE..............(TO EVERYONE) !!!

LOVE is something which I don't understand..it is so different !!! Love hurts the most..and is also the best pain killer. Why do some people call it a game?Is it always necessary that one should win or lose in love?I personally feel that love is stupid..it isint about the words we say,the actions we take,the things we do,the hearts we break..its about people who can look at each other and just know !!!(My fav quote on love-Love is giving someone the chance to destroy you and trusting them not to)Sometimes the hardest thing to do are the things that really matter.I have grown to understand what love is yet always fail in it !!Love was all about looks for me..but I grew to understand that love is something beyond that...heart,soul!!!The astonishing fact is that people change..fuck the looks..but by their heart,their character,their behaviour .... this amazes me.Change is inevitable ...if this is so then how will love survive?What if someday a person wakes up and feels no longer love for you?Well this can happen..but this is certainly not love.


Actually what inspired me to write on love is that I started believing in love..I feel it truly exists.Sometimes its not meant to work..but not all the time.Being lonely is the worst feeling in life.I suddenly started feeling a weird thing in me..all my life I hated kids,complained about marriage,feared being old and scared of death.Maybe now I see life from a different perspective..its not the same now.Its a fresh new beginning where there is no vengeance.At some point or the other,everyone gets back the way they deserve,I believe in this,so why waste time on hatred?There is someone who knows what you are going through ,the way you have been cheated or treated ..there is someone who is gonna act on behalf of us.Sometimes we cant judge whats right and wrong..many a times we feel we are right..but we are not ..we are mostly blind to our faults.I think this is where love comes into the picture..your loved one's correct you,guide you,accept you despite your faults.Love is not only having fun..its also sharing sorrows..being there for one another.My mom once told me that if you have been stepped on,that doesn't mean that the person went ahead of you,someday somewhere sometime that person is going to face the same but even more harder !!I had some hatred in me..but now I think its a waste of time..some people don't deserve to run in my head.


Don't settle for the one you can live with..wait for the one you can't live without.So the happy part is that i am still living...guess I dint find anyone worth dying for.I can't live with people who say things and never mean it or those words which once said makes no sense to them or those who feel good about the fact that they get out of a relationship smoothly or say the chicken hearted ones (lol).Learn to face the shit you created !!

LIFE IS TOO SHORT..JUST LOVE AND FORGIVE !!!

"Happiness is enhanced by others, but does not depend upon others. "

True..so true !! Somebody once told me "you don't have to bear people you don't like"..seriously why pretend??? I have done that so many times..I wont completely agree to the pretending part but I have tolerated a few people who dint deserve the pain I took to bear them.Some people are like pain in the ass.Sometimes I think of making a list and putting it up on facebook..but NO that's rude ! You know what I love the most in me..everyone i dislike knows that I dislike them..its easy to point it out in my case.The symptoms are :

1.I don't talk much
2.I don't eat or drink anything that is offered to me
3.I sit and think about when I get to leave that place
4.I put on a very fake smile

Anyways,today I want to talk about happiness and love.I thought a lot about it last night and came to the conclusion that only love can get you happiness and only being happy and spreading happiness everywhere can get you love and acceptance from others.If someone leaves you,it doesn't mean that its the end of your life.There is a purpose for everything that happens in our lifes.Today from the place where I stand , I feel what ever I have accomplished is due to the failure I had faced in my life.

I had the worst day yesterday.All my life i had heard of people making fun of my school(UNITED INDIAN SCHOOL/ U.I.S) but yesterday I got to know why we were made fun off.Our school consists of only malayalis(and this is certainly not something to be made fun of)..I love mallus..I had always been with them.But yesterday's mallu gang was the heights . Personally no issues with any one of them..we were minding our own business..but there was this one cheap ass , wannabe mallu who irritated me.You know what I hate the most in him? Its that you just add the letter "E" to my name and that becomes his name..wow..was his dad thinking about me when he was naming his son???For a moment I wished to be a mallu and then the next moment I realised that it would only embarrass me and nothing else.

Happy??yea..why not???So many reasons for it..for example:am being so much encouraged to continue writing my blog and also being appreciated(by my friends lol),am getting the cell phone of my dreams,am gonna get graduated soon,now a days 'I ask and I receive'(thank you DAD),I feel I no longer miss anyone,am going to shop on next Thursday,I found the exact lipstick I was looking for,I get my size of jeans everywhere,suddenly ITS BEEN RAINING MEN ! , I might go to Bangalore in June (and also get a tattoo and belly piercing) etc etc...lol

MEN WHO TURN YOU OFF !!!

1.Men who watch MTV ROADIES
2.Men who like flowers
3.Men who can fight but doesn't
4.Men who can't keep their word
5.Men who flirt all the time...sometimes is fine !!
6.Men who got a bad taste in dressing
7.Men who accept their defeat even before they are defeated
8.Men who act like Mr.Bean
9.Men who tell a filmy dialogue when in a serious situation
10.The guy who sent me this message on facebook -
"Hmm Ma name is ****** U can Call me ****..!! m styng in manipal..!! actly frm singapore India is ma mother land nd singapore is ma 2nd homw town..!! M styng in manipal with ma auntys house..!! Ma parents r in singapore..!! ma dad hav own ship yaards n ships in singapore..!! n Ma mom is DR. in singapore.!! N i've intrst in tattooing m gng 2 stdy prfsnl course tattooing in thialnd n DJ course 2..!! N i love hang out frnds n i Love clubbing 2 d core...!! Cn v b frndz dea :) "

AHHMEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

MATERIAL GIRL !!!!

Some boys kiss me, some boys hug me
I think they're O.K.
If they don't give me proper credit
I just walk away

They can beg and they can plead
But they can't see the light, that's right
'Cause the boy with the cold hard cash
Is always Mister Right, 'cause we are


Living in a material world
And I am a material girl
You know that we are living in a material world
And I am a material girl

Some boys romance, some boys slow dance
That's all right with me
If they can't raise my interest then I
Have to let them be

Some boys try and some boys lie but
I don't let them play
Only boys who save their pennies
Make my rainy day, 'cause they are

Living in a material world
And I am a material girl
You know that we are living in a material world
And I am a material girl


Boys may come and boys may go
And that's all right you see
Experience has made me rich
And now they're after me, 'cause everybody's

Living in a material world
And I am a material girl
You know that we are living in a material world
And I am a material girl

A material, a material, a material, a material world

Living in a material world
Living in a material world !!!!

SHOPPING !!!

shopping is an art..only practice makes you better!!over the years i have mastered this art..and am so proud of it !!!!!!

yesterday was "only shopping " day for me...all i did was shop.thanks to my aunt who equally enjoys shopping like I do.I got a suitcase full of clothes ..i don't even have enough place to store them!who cares...i can buy a new closet !!!

shopping makes me forget all my troubles..i always do it when am stressed..its more better than yoga . trust me on that...i remember the day before my exams..i was so tensed..so u know what i did to get over my tension.what i hate doing the most is shopping for others..everything i buy for others i feel will look good on me.. i know am being greedy and selfish..what can i do???its clothes after all...and one more thing i hate doing is going shopping with friends..i prefer to be alone when i choose my clothes..people confuse me..i know what looks best on me and when i don't, i know on whom it will look the best..so i gift it to them(lol)......


see am not a bad girl when it comes to shopping..its my second love.(first love is self love isint it?)what can i do if i love myself so much..???why shouldn't i??i fall in love fast but get out of it even more faster..this is so true..even my Chinese horoscope says so about me.but am so deeply committed to myself and shopping..maybe i never found anyone or anything better than my first two love..long time back i thought i did..but NO WAYS !!shopping is way better...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.

A man dies daily, only to be reborn in the morning, bigger, better and wiser.So true..today am bigger,better and wiser(lol may be). .

Today was a great day..felt so good.I realized that anyone can do anything in their life if they want to.People try to put u down..those are not your enemies..they only help you to grow stronger and better.There are also people who support you..we call them friends.I had a proper mixture of both..lol i dont know what bullshit am writing ..ha ha ha...i just thought i would make my blog inspirational today ..that's why i googled for an appropriate caption.Anyways let me be original now..so yea today ...today was a good day..loved it..!!! So excited about going shopping tomorrow..shopping is one thing that makes me so happy and forget all my worries..even buyin a pair of socks makes me happy.

Am so blank today..maybe I will come up with something better tomorrow..Good night!!

CANCER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Frankly...i don't know how it happens but all i know is that when it happens , a person is gone (if not known at an early stage).i know i am writing after a very long time and that too i chose to write about cancer..weird ! actually the very thought of how dangerous cancer proves to be has deeply moved me..in fact it was an all CANCER DAY for me yesterday. all i heard about was cancer,all i spoke about was cancer,all i read about was cancer,all i thought about was cancer,all i dreamt about was cancer and bla bla bla...


Let me elaborate myself here..


1.first thing my mom told me in the morning was "come soon from MC.Donald's cause Bosco uncle's wife's requiem mass is in salmiya and we have to go for it" and guess what? yea she died due to cancer (may her soul R.I.P)






2.we were at Apurva's house.Kiwi says "i gotta leave by 4.30 cause my aunt who once had cancer is coming to visit me "





3.then we go to our 12Th grade teacher's house.she told me something which completely broke me down.A girl in my school who left a long time back to London was dead due to cancer..i never knew her personally but that moment i felt that she was my best friend..i could see her picture in front of my eyes...the dead old memories were so fresh and alive.i couldn't express this to anyone because i wasn't sure of what i was feeling.that moment was indescribable and one of those rare moments in my life.

hope that she is having a good time up there .. may her soul rest in peace !!!
MISS YOU SHAHNAZ!








4.And then lastly..as usual i was watching a movie before i sleep and guess which one it had to be ..."A WALK TO REMEMBER".Gosh why did Mandy Moore have to die because of cancer???why not aids?or a kidney failure?i fell in love with Shane west..actually i fell in love with the love that Mandy Moore and Shane west portrayed in that movie.

this was all about my CANCER DAY celebrated on 3.05.2010! i think i will always remember this day..i don't think anyone reads my blog but if someone ever comes across this one , all am gonna say is that go for a routine check up.u lose nothing..maybe a few drops of blood but those few drops may save your life!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FAISAL !!!

Faisal(march 9Th,1990).. his very existence made my life so beautiful.Met him 6 years back..right now he is 7 seas away from me but the memories we shared are still fresh and alive in my heart.

Here is something i want to share with you..The first time we met you touched my cheek..that gave me a very bad impression of you ..little did i know that touch was not on my cheek but on my heart.I remember every single moment i spent with you..those moments were so special..never did they come in my life again.I still remember how we used to get beaten up in the tuition,how we used to fool our parents and talk for hours on the phone,how we used to fight for silly things,how i used to irritate you with my 6page long Hindi letter and how you used to struggle to read them,how you used to wait for me after school.I always wonder how you used to ever bear me?i still remember this incident which increased my respect for you..remember when i told you that you were like my brother and you said 'NO WAYS...YOU ARE JUST MY FRIEND..MY BEST FRIEND' and then i asked you if we could become more than a friend and you said ' WE ARE...BUT A LITTLE LESS THAN LOVERS' ! That was the heights...you are perfect..not a spot.You were there for me when i was emotionally weak..i could always count on you..i remember how u always supported me..how u always encouraged me.This is something i always wanted to learn from you.My eyes are waiting to see you...God knows when am i ever going to see you...you went so far from me..U.K..MANCHESTER..Hope you are having the time of your life.I am so happy for you..you already made it to the top and i hope u never see back.I dedicate this blog to you...i don't care what the world has to say about you...you are always special for me..and you always will be.When the whole world got our friendship wrong,it was only our true friendship which proved others wrong.I am proud of our relation.I never want to lose you..that would be the worst day of my life.All i want to say is that i really love you no matter where you are..i will always keep you in my prayers..i hope the best thing in life comes your way..Make your parents proud!


I can write a book on our friendship..or say i can make this entire blog about us..but some things are better unsaid..we know what we share and that is what is most important.I couldn't think of giving you anything on your birthday..so i thought i would let you know where you stand in my life !

WISH YOU A VERY VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY..YOU ARE OLDER THAN YESTERDAY BUT YOUNGER THAN TOMORROW..YOU ARE NOT GETTING OLDER,JUST MORE DISTINGUISHED........HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SOMEONE WHO IS FOREVER YOUNG !

WHAT A FEELING ?!!

First when there's nothing
but a slow glowing dream
that your fear seems to hide
deep inside your mind.
All alone I have cried
silent tears full of pride
in a world made of steel,
made of stone.
Well, I hear the music,
close my eyes,
feel the rhythm,
wrap around,
take a hold of my heart.
What a feeling.
Bein's believin'.
I can have it all,
now I'm dancing for my life.
Take your passion
and make it happen.
Pictures come alive,
you can dance right through your life.
Now I hear the music,
close my eyes,
I am rhythm.
In a flash it takes hold of my heart.
What a feeling.
Bein's believin'.
I can have it all,
now I'm dancing for my life.
Take your passion
and make it happen.
Pictures come alive,
now I'm dancing through my life.
What a feeling.
What a feeling
I AM MUSIC NOW
Bein's believin'.
I AM RHYTHM NOW
Pictures come alive,
you can dance right through your life.
What a feeling.
YOU CAN REALLY HAVE IT ALL
What a feeling.
PICTURES COME ALIVE WHEN I CALL
I can have it all
I CAN REALLY HAVE IT ALL
Have it all
PICTURES COME ALIVE WHEN I CALL
CALL CALL CALL CALL
WHAT A FEELINGI
can have it all
BEIN'S BELIEVIN
Bein's believin'
TAKE YOUR PASSION
MAKE IT HAPPEN
make it happen
WHAT A FEELING
what a feeling
BEIN'S BELIEVIN'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WORDS OF WISDOM !!!

If you want to study yourself -- look into the hearts of other people. If you want to study other people -- look into your own heart.
-Friedrich von Schiller

People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes
-Abigail Van Buren

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
-Erica Jong

He that gives good advice, builds with one hand; he that gives good counsel and example, builds with both; but he that gives good admonition and bad example, builds with one hand and pulls down with the other.
-Francis Bacon

He only profits from praise who values criticism.
-Heinrich Heine

Take it easy -- but take it.
-Woody Guthrie

MORNING COMES (as mornings always do)

Under a lovers' sky
Gonna be with you
And noone's gonna be around
If you think that you won't fall
Well just wait until
Til the sun goes down

Underneath the starlight - starlight
There's a magical feeling - so right
It'll steal your heart tonight

You can try to resist
Try to hide from my kiss
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
Deep in the dark
You'll surrender your heart
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
No, you can't fight it
It's gonna get to your heart

There's no escape from love
Once a gentle breeze
Weaves it's spell upon your heart
No matter what you think
It won't be too long
Til your in my arms
Underneath the starlight - starlight
We'll be lost in the rhythm - so right
Feel it steal your heart tonight

You can try to resist
Try to hide from my kiss
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
Deep in the dark
You'll surrender your heart
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
No you can't fight it
No matter what you do
The night is gonna get to you

Don't try then
You're never gonna win

Underneath the starlight - starlight
There's a magical feeling - so right
It will steal your heart tonight

You can try to resist
Try to hide from my kiss
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
Deep in the dark
You'll surrender your heart
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
No, you can't fight it

You can try to resist
Try to hide from my kiss
But you know
Don't you know that you can't fight the moonlight
Deep in the dark
You'll surrender your heart
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
No, you can't fight it
It's gonna get to your heart

Prejudice is opinion without judgement !!!!!

SEEING IS BELIEVING...forget what u heard...experience life your way...you learn from mistakes..that doesn't mean u keep on making mistakes in order to learn...this phrase is so easy to say and even more easy to type..lol..i always make a mistake..then one more mistake and then one more and then one more and then one more and then one more........................GOSH am i ever gonna learn !!!!


they say you meet the right people after meeting the wrong ones ...but i keep meeting the wrong ones and then the wrong ones and then again the wrong ones and then again the wrong ones.........GOSH am i that naive ???? in this very same context my uncle cum best friend said that 'YOUR LIKE A BUTTERFLY...OVER THE YEARS YOU WILL BE A MOTH' !!! but i don't wanna look ugly...


my best friend told me that i am not matured...why did he say that?is it because i make the wrong decisions or because i act like a kid sometimes...could be both !!!anyways when friends say such things i gotta take it...no matter how hard it is to digest.

ANOTHER DAY IN MY LIFE ............CONTINUES !

Got up this morning with sweat all over my face..! loll nothing happened..was feeling hot!listening to 'murder on the dance floor' and feeling so good.what a lovely day outside..pleasant weather but stuck up at home..one of those political riots in mangalore.thinking what to write today..just when i get Internet it seems like everyone else went back to the stone age..the only ones online is me and some lesbians from Cyprus.oh yea i will tell the whole story as to how i got the contacts of these homosexuals..its like i was creating an account in zorpia 7 years back and BY MISTAKE i wrote my sexual status as bisexual.from then on i was constantly hit by many females who wanted to have web cam chat with me.

let me think about something to talk about..hmmmm..those two bitches in my class?Na i wrote about them in my last post.go back and read it if u wanna.hmmm..about my aspirations?Na they keep on changing daily..today i wish to be an astronaut ...but am a pessimist..scared that my oxygen cylinder would fall short..guess i will stay on earth.

WE WERENT BORN TO FOLLOW !!!

I know i flicked the caption from Jon Bon Jovi..hope he doesn't mind !!! my first post in the year 2010..yea i know it has been a long time...you can say i was not in touch with the world wide web for a very long time.lets start with life..hmm its good..kinda boring...aint bad...alot of things happening...alot of things on my to-do lists etc etc...health?sucks..stuck with a bad cold..rough voice..eye infection..skin allergy :(

college is sad...hate two girls in class( big shot)..one is from Kuwait but has ultimately turned into a typical localite along with a cheap mentality..then comes the old fashioned ,dark-circled wannabe friend who hasn't got any sense in dressing but acts like Paris Hilton !! i got 5 pink panties and here how the conversation goes..she tells me"don't you wash your panties?anyways i got a huge collection of panties too "..i haven't heard anything that lame since i left my old shitty village last year ! they don't even spend a penny but put great demands on others..for instance..imagine their aunty is coming down from dubai, they will either give a long list to them or just wait for them to give something which they could never afford.well different species i suppose..i had never encountered such kinds before nor do i wish to in the near future..!!!


after college - FUN !!! its so much like i have been freed from my cage.we do different things..oh did i mention i joined swimming classes..its fun..just screwed up my skin and hair(dyed it pink and apparently turned into some other unidentifiable color) !


Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.talking about bad memory..i have got the worst memory ever...i forget people's name and face in a jiffy. its rude at times..but cant help it.

its 12 in the night now..guess its time to sleep or else i may sleep in class tomorrow like others..~